What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
