I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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