i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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