i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
