I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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