Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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