Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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