I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
