I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
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She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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