Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
