There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
