I would go down on you faster than GM stock
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
