Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
