Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Where is the hickey?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
