I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
No...this little piggys going to the bar
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
