Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
