I woke up to her vacumming the grass
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
