a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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