I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
