youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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