it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
My life is pants optional.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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