I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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