Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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