Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize