All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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