We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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