We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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