Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
