Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize