There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
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Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
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What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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