i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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