somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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