five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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