I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize