i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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