I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
