she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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