weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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