sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
