omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
