i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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