he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize