Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Come on in and take your pants off
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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