Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
