that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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