in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Just high enough for therapy.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
