She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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