my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
