when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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