If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
